I Flat Out Hate Twitter

I wish I could write a few sentences detailing the many benefits of such a seamless connectivity, as many of us will and should, but I really cannot. For me, Twitters deficiencies far outweigh the benefits, so much so that they are the only things I can think about. Don't believe me? Here are the current trending topics as of 1:30 p.m. this afternoon here in the heart of America: the internet.

#happy17thbdaybiebs , #isbetterthan , #guttbye , Jensen Ackles ,

Jane Russell , Ana Maria Braga , Justin Drew Bieber , Rubén González , FCAT , TAKS

I don't know whether to blame Youtube or Twitter for Justin Biebers career.

I randomly copy & pasted some tweets:

OMGTeenQuotez I think im afraid to be happy because whenever you do get too happy, something bad always happens

Very useful instruction for the maintenance of teen depression from media outlet OMGTeenQuotez.

Heres a strange one:

From 'The Social Network' to 'Citizen Kane', plenty of great movies have been losers at the Oscars.

Thats from Time Magazine, too. With so many advertisements, so to speak, for links to companies websites in the interest of their site traffic, it makes you wonder what you're really doing on Twitter. That Tweet is an advertisement for an article which has an advertisement, all of which are paid for with your eyeballs.

You Did NOT Remember My Birthday

It may sound strange, but I am vehemently opposed to well-wishing in an impersonal fashion. We've all done it. I used to do it, but I quit cold turkey one day when I was responding to a mass "Merry Christmas" text message. Amidst composing the message, it hit me like a ton of bricks: how much and whose time am I really wasting here? It got me thinking.

Holiday text messages, mass or personal, are entirely a waste of time. I find them interchangeable with Happy Birthday wall posts. The back-up shooting guard from modified basketball in 7th grade: Happy Birthday dude! That weird kid who moved 10 years ago and thinks the internet makes him friends with everyone and anyone: Happy Birthday man, what are you up to these days? I don't even know this guy: Happy birthday. A girl who I was never really friends with and haven't spoken to in 3 years: Happy Birthdayyyyyyyyyyy ! ! Do they all expect responses? I don't think so, how could they?

The message is in the medium, ask Marshall McLuhan. Is it really a nice thing to do? To make someones phone vibrate all day long on his or her birthday? Believe it or not, but I remember the birthdays that matter in my life. I do not need a link to your profile. I bought my girlfriend tickets to a show and took her to dinner, but I did not write on her wall. It's a waste of time and it says an infinite amount about you.